Pendulums

My partner bought me my first ever pendulum over the Christmas period, (Yes, I celebrate Christmas as well as winter solstice, it is out of respect for my family who have always celebrated it).
I have always been interested in scrying but never actually found the pendulum that was right for me, and I don't like buying any type of crystal just because its popular or because I want to learn something, if I cant find a connection with something I will leave it and understand that its not my time yet and wait until it is my time to learn - and it just so happened to be my time :)


We (me, my partner and his father) went into the local new age shop when we were in Colchester and I was just browsing, not really expecting to find anything when I saw the glass case with pendulums. And there was one pendulum that stood out to me, when I looked at it I felt like I was in a Whirlpool and going into a deep meditation - I knew it was right for me from that moment, no crystal has ever made me feel that way before.
Also the women in the shop were so lovely and really nice, which made the whole experience even better :)

When we had arrived home, my mum handed me our Christmas presents from her and my dad, and I opened one and found out it was another pendulum, and I was a little nervous with this, like I said I normally don't go with things if I don't have a connection so I was a little worried in case I couldn't get on with this one. But luckily enough I did and this pendulum is just as brilliant and I love them both.

I have found that my first pendulum has a lot of character to him (they both have male energies about them), he likes to show off to other people who wish to work with him, like my partner. And the other one is a little but more shy I feel, maybe its because I haven't worked with him enough for us to get to know each other more, (No, I am not crazy when I say that, it just means I haven't put enough energy and concentration with this one unlike I have done with my first).

Fluorite pendulum (my first one)

Rose Quartz pendulum

Ogham

Most of this year I have been trying to learn about Ogham. I thought it was going to be easy and something similar to the elder futhark runes..Oh how wrong I was about that and I feel it will be just the same when it comes to learning about the runes.

Although I could learn the basics about Ogham and then start using it for divination purpose, I feel that I would be cheating with myself. I want to dive right in and find all about it, well read up on all the information there is about this Alphabet and then use it for many other uses, such as for ritual purpose or to inscribe something on my staff etc. I don't just want to use it for divination as I feel it has so many more uses than that.

I am also hoping to create my own Ogham sticks, and when I do I will be posting many photos.

There is something about Ogham that has really pulled me close to it and I hope later on I will be able to tell you all more about this fantastically mysterious form of divination and alphabet.

Understanding why

Was going to make a video about this but the words just wouldn't come out, so maybe sometime later, I dunno.
Anyways if you watch my YouTube channel you will know that I have gone for a bit. I was feeling depressed that I couldn't make certain videos, that I couldn't do my divination or meditation anymore..Everything around me was telling me to stop, so I did. I will be back to making videos in January, but hopefully my usual day to day things will happen on or after winter solstice.

Right on to what this entry was actually about..

I feel that I know why everything was stopping me, especially with making videos...I was trying too hard to be someone that I am not. I saw every ones videos and how good they were, managing to make to record them and be so good at it. I just wanted to look like that. But I am different from them, it takes me a bit more time to understand things, I say things differently to what other people would say and that confuses people. I am not slow I am just awkward lol!
So yea, I think I might go back to basics and just start from there really.

Goals for 2010

So its nearly a new year, cant believe it. Time has gone by so fast it doesn't feel like it should be the end of the year, only the beginning.
I know I ain't done that much this year, only learning, researching and finally starting to understand who I am.
So what I am hoping will happen in 2010:

• Find and understand even more about myself
• Start making more body scrubs, bath bombs, bath oils
• Learn how to make soap, body lotion, herbal teas
• Learn Ogham, rune, I ching divination
• Understand more about my path
• And finally get my herbalism course finished!

There is thousand more things that I want to achieve, but I feel like I should start small..Ok the list doesn't seem small, but believe you me this is a small list!
I have chosen these things because I feel these take up the most energy, and I want to get these "out of the way" so I can restore my energy and feel better about myself, instead of regretting that I never did these.